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Goughy's Go - Blowing my own trumpet

06/10/2010 07:14:22 PM

If you can't beat em, join em!

Just one full day after cursing the invention of them, yours truly is now the proud owner of his very own vuvuzela.

Now for those few of you back home not yet familiar with the term vuvuzela - obviously those who did not watch last year's Confederations Cup in South Africa or Australia's recent World Cup warm-up matches here against Denmark and the United States - the vuvuzela is a distinct sounding horn that is the musical instrument of choice everywhere you turn in South Africa.

Well musical instrument is being generous - it actually has no rhythm whatsoever and actually sounds like a foghorn or even an elephant.

As Bren and I waited at a bus stop for two hours ahead of our trip to Soccer City in Soweto to collect our official World Cup accreditation passes, we were 'assaulted' by the constant blaring of vuvuzelas as South Africans of all sizes, ages and colours descended on Sandton to watch their team in an official street parade - all armed of course with their very own vuvuzela.

Not only that but thousands more were blowing out of passing cars in Johannesburg's never-ending traffic and by the end of the day I swear I thought I would be hearing vuvuzelas in my sleep for ever and a day.

But as FIFA supremo Sepp Blatter himself said when he was being urged to ban the vuvuzela at this World Cup, what is the point of holding the World Cup in Africa if you can't let Africans behave as they normally do at any football match in this country.

As Blatter said "We should not try to Europeanise a World Cup."

But I had to admit I still had my doubts as to whether the vuvuzela would ruin the enjoyment of this World Cup - that is until I got one of my own.

And not just any vuvuzela but one complete with the Australian flag and Socceroos name.

While mine may only be small - indeed some of the ones we have seen are so big it almost takes two to carry them - it does the job nonetheless.

Indeed the potential of the vuvuzela when adapted back to everyday life in Melbourne is endless.

Imagine at the MCG when your team is hanging on by a point with seconds to go and the opposition is attacking, you could just blow your vuvuzela and the umpire would mistake it for the final siren and you would have just secured your team four points.

And they can be just as useful for everyday life as well - what better way to get your lazy teenage son or daughter out of bed in the morning by blowing the vuvuzela right in their ear.

And next time the cat or the dog gets up to mischief, well talk about the ultimate payback.

So the next time I think I just can't tolerate the sound of another vuvuzela - already the thought of how loud an 84,000 strong crowd at Soccer City in Soweto for Friday's opening World Cup clash between South African and Mexico is a terrifying thought in itself - I will just join in the fun and blow my own trumpet.

Which by the way some people have said I have been doing for years anyway!

 
Comments
Posted by Mutes at
11/06/2010 07:29 PM
Gold Gold Gold....nice work Goughy...very amusing...though, I am not looking to your return now. My god, you were loud enough before!
Posted by Anders at
13/06/2010 02:48 PM
Drums, trumpets, rattles, cheers, waves, singing - they all contribute to the emotion of the game. These things are constant, annoying, don't relate to the play like a sudden cheer. I for one just won't watch. Hopefully the response from broadcasters will give an indication of what the rest of the world thinks. Just a shame they won't be able to ask for some money back from Fifa to pay for their costs in complaints handling and reduced audiences.
Posted by craig jessop at
21/06/2010 09:29 PM
You r the biggest man I have ever seen. The thought of you with a vuvuzela is truly frightening. Paul how do you manage to eat when you are blowing a vuvuzela.
Posted by www.sportal.com.au at
28/03/2011 06:39 PM
Www sportal com.. Not so bad :)

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